Covid19

I am tired 

Tired of the Covid19 news, its getting haywire its getting worst or because we are in Malaysia that's why its not getting better ?

When the whole world is fighting for the virus, Malaysia politicians are fighting for their power fighting for their fame and status

I am tired Rakyat are tired 

So many negative news has been sharing for more than a year coming to two years now 

Yes, I am fortunate 

I managed to reunion with my family and found new job during the tough time when many has lost their source of income, I manage to made quite a big decision and sail through it as well but now my country is suffering 

This is not getting any better for everyone's mental health, we are worrying

Worrying that we could be the next victim, the virus is everywhere and so near so close to people surrounding us 

I pray that my parents can stay health 

I pray that our family can sail through this difficult time

I pray that you are healthy and find your state of calm 

I pray that the next time i write is about the good thing the happy incident and not worrying about Covid19 anymore 

Im back to KL - 2021

Funny how things turn, after 4 years plus working in SG, I have now relocate back to KL 

Same me, alone. 

Same room, bunk bed. 

Same company, different department. 

But everything felt so different, yet so similar

I started to recall the push factors to SG, lolll to runaway from all the family stress, want to find myself, want to be independent, want to see how far I can go on my own, tired of Malaysia's politic and system bullshit

And the pull factor to come back to KL ? Really to be with my family 

Everything felt so surreal, but then again after few years, everything changed too. 

I thought I will be back to the 2017, I was wrong. 

Honestly, I don't regret the decision to come back KL, I do miss my freedom mostly in SG, the follow the rule kind of life but I unable to find the direction, the core, the base in the foreign country. 

So here I am, in KL start over and closer to family. 

Different mindset. 

Post dump

oh hey here I am again 

Pick up my very own space to talk about myself again 

Yes , maybe now this is actually the best place for me to share my thought. 

I think i have not making any update since then, yes i am now 31 years old. 

Same old me , same old single , same old no progression in my relationship life. 

I am now working in Singapore , yes in fact here for almost 3 years. 

but i am not at my happiest moment in life. 

working life in Singapore started quite good where i get to stay with my friends, working with commissions and yes, it is so much much more stress compare to before. 

Then i changed my job, shits happened when Mindy Mark broke up ,all three of us separate our ways and stay at different places now. 

So now here i am staying alone with landlord. 

But life never been good as well, working in a shit company and shit management, i am losing my confident after a several failed interview. 

Sad sad case , at this mid life crisis, I am alone, poor, and someone not making progression in life and that I meant love life & financially of course. 

I kinda wonder sometimes, am i now in depression cause i constantly feel stress , and miserable. 

I totally get that if you want something to change you gotta make a move. I want something to change , i want to go back home. 

But it never seems easy. 

I hate to declare that this could be the lowest point in my life. People see me having fun and deep down i know how fuck up my life is. 

Urrghhh, is writing out my feelings going to help me feel better ?

March 2015

Almost a quarter pass by for 2015, the society is worrying about GST that going to implement on 1st April .

Time flies ain't it ? 

Well ... As I recap on what I've wrote on last post, today yes today 27/3/2015 (Friday) I finally owned the very first car in my life - Mazda 2 soul red ! 

Yes .... I bought myself a car like finally and 900 bucks 9 years commitment ...! I'm officially need more and more money now ...! 

However , as my life never easy ... so there was something not quite favorable happened this evening when I was collecting my car ...! 

The front part of my car was having 3 patch of .... I don't know what shit I should called it that need to repaint the whole part of it .

Silly Huh ? How could this thing ever happen to me ? What is this luck called ? 

Totally not in the new car mood from high to low . 

Guess I'm driving U later baby ... We shal meet little later. 

Last Sunday of 2014

Every here and then I realize that I've abandon my blog for such a long time

It seems like my blog is already becoming a place I fare goodbye to years .

Yes , today is the last Sunday I'm havin for year 2014 .

Probably should take a recap on what happened in this years however nothing much changed this year , I'm still single and available , work for the same company Manulife , travel to Taiwan Phuket Bangkok . 

Met a guy that I thought we could had it all somehow he just not so into me , same shits happen when I can't even know what's went wrong . You like me ? Straight up dude ! 

On the other side ,

Life seems getting on track for me and I'm hoping to get myself a car by next beginning of the year .

Btw, just attended my lovely honey Nana wedding yesterday , and I here wishing her once more ... Happy Marriage my lovely friend 😘 

To end my post for probably the last post on 2014 .

肮脏

马年已经过了三个月了，显然明显的。。。。。马来西亚犯了马年太岁！

现在的马来西亚真的很糟糕

缺水 - 多个雪兰莪地区已经开始了长达两个星期的配水，大家一天有自来水一天没有自来水，原本已经编排好的配水时间表也开始乱了阵脚。 唉~ 还有同事就真的快一个月没有水用，这到底是什么 ？天气酷热原来可以导致一个国家那么的缺水 ？ 我不明白了。。。。

烟雾袭击 - 空气素质已经到达了不健康水平，想说也快两个星期了，想在的烟雾已经不再是邻国传来的，是天气导致的自焚。。。。

飞机不见了 - MH370 很不幸的在上个周六消失在空中，这是一个国际关注的新闻，但是马来西亚却闹出了一大堆的丢脸事情，看的国人面子尽失。

心情很烦，空气很糟，没有清新的水源洗涤心灵。。。。。。

年

到处都是新年的气氛，鞭炮声红灯笼。

我也像往常一样，买了新衣新鞋。

可是我的心…一点都感受不到那新年该有的心情，甚至还有点悲伤。

悲伤的是，时间不能倒流，关系渐行渐远了。

自私的表现？不会沟通的表现？还是根本不再留恋的表现？

这个农历年，过的…还真的比我想象的还要遥远！

笑不起来😕

有时候我承认自己很自私，已经没有为他们考虑的余地，自己也变的不会去爱别人，只考虑到自己。

是怎样造成我的自私呢？

我不懂，我也不想去懂。

自私鬼在这一刻…沉沦！